This is insanity!

It doesn't take a genius to figure this one out. As a matter of fact, the source of this quote has never really been proven to have come from Albert Einstein. A Narcotics Anonymous pamphlet, dated 1981, stated that "Insanity is repeating the same mistakes and expecting different results." Same thing...only different! Henry Ford was attributed as saying, "If you always do what you’ve always done, you’ll always get what you’ve always got" but, as far as I'm concerned, it belongs to my Weight Watchers lecturer, Ann B., who recited that in the early 1980s. Because the wording gets changed, ever so slightly, many people get credited for the same quote. But I digress. The source of quotes was not what I'd intended to write about today.

I think we can all relate to this quote. We have done things over and over and over again and failed to make that one change that makes the difference; the thing that saves our sanity, or even our lives. This trait is not limited to humans. Let me start by telling you about the birds and the bees and flies.

A little over a week ago, I was sitting on my living room couch and reading. Just beyond the windows, there is a free-standing flag pole from which an American flag hangs 24/7. On this particular day, with little to no wind and the flag hanging limp, motion outside the window grabbed my attention. I soon discovered that a female Hooded Oriole was continually flying to the flag and going up within the vertical folds. She was carrying a piece of plant fiber in her beak and desperately trying to attach this material to the flag in order to begin weaving a nest. Each attempt resulting in the fiber wafting down to the ground. She would fly off, bring back another piece and try again. This went on for hours and hours, and then day after day. Her determination was amazing but my heart was breaking every time I watched her futile attempts at starting a nest. I even spoke to her, telling her to just move over to the tree which is next to the house and a mere 8 feet from the flag. I knew that a slight change would allow her to build her nest and have her babies. Insanity?

When I leave the door to the patio open, it is inevitable that a bee or a fly will come into the house. It will fly around for a bit, exploring the new territory. I will then hear this fly or bee bouncing off the glass of a window, or even the patio door. Tink, tink, tink. It continually pounds against the glass, looking to escape. Tink, tink, tink. On and on it goes. If I see it on the door, which is still open, I try to coax the bee or fly to move in the right direction so it can fly outside. The poor little bugger usually views me as a threat and flies away. Later on, I find it's dead body on a window sill. If only it knew to try something different or just move a little bit to the right or left and discover the path to freedom. Insanity?

And now I must tell you about me. I have been struggling with my weight for quite some time. I'm not talking about dealing with dropping 25 or 50 pounds, I'm talking about triple digits! I keep trying different things and hoping for better results.

Three years ago, I signed up to work with a diet coach for 6 months. She immediately took me off all dairy products and then, two weeks later, had me eliminate gluten from my diet. Without doing anything else, I slowly and easily dropped 50 pounds in a year.

A year ago, I decided to eat dairy products again. I managed to keep the weight off, but was frustrated by nothing more coming off. And then, last fall, it happened. My weight began to creep up again. When I found myself up by 17 pounds, I got nervous. What was I going to do? I found a company that would deliver frozen gluten-free meals to me every week. I chose a 7-day plan that provided 3 meals a day for 6 days and 2 meals for the 7th day. This gave me one evening a week to go out for dinner. It was nice because I didn't have to think about planning, shopping or cooking. I dropped about 12 pounds the first week. Awesome! And then my weight barely changed over the following weeks. Frustrating! But after a few months of that I was finally got the 17 pounds off. I got bored with the meals and started going our more. In the past three months, my weight has risen 30 pounds! I'm feeling very scared. What do I do now???

That lovely little female oriole jolted me into reality. I knew for sure that she needed to stop doing the same thing over and over again. I knew for sure that a slight change would make all the difference for her. That's when I realized I was just like her. Over and over again I was looking for an easy and comfortable way to lose weight. Over and over again I was letting old habits come back. Over and over again the weight would come off and more would come on. Over and over again I avoided exercise. Over and over again I have berated myself. Over and over and over..... INSANITY??? I hope not. I am now seriously looking at what I can do to break this cycle. I'm going to move from the flag to the tree or find the open door and fly to freedom.

By the way, I didn't see the oriole pecking away at the flag today. I hope she found a tree that was to her liking and started building her nest.